Monday, March 1, 2010


Today was a hard day. I accepted defeat. I tried really hard to push to the end, but not hard enough.

I am in a drawing class that is required for graduation but doesn't really help me with my goal to be a photographer. This is an intro class, so I went in thinking it would be no big deal. The teacher would see that I could give it my all and pass me on effort alone. Every assignment that I have handed in so far has been given back to me with red scribbles saying "come on Val, you can do this"...."show me you know this" "fix" or "redo". I re-did all of my assignments and handed them back in last week. Still not good enough. He didn't change any of my grades because I still couldn't draw a perfect ellipse or my perspective drawings weren't what he was looking for. My teacher does not give you a grade UNLESS you can do it right. Almost 2 months in and I am still failing.

My frustration is this: How is it that a teacher expects you to magically learn to draw one day when everyone else that is in that class is there to draw for a living, they have a gift that they have been taming since they were young. HOW IN THE WORLD IS THIS AN INTRO CLASS? Don't you think this class should be at a learning level where even the crappiest of crap can do this? OR am I really that stupid?

I feel stupid.

I left in the middle of class today not able to hold back the tears. I tried, I really did. Needless to say, I have decided to drop the class. I will try again another day in the future, with a different teacher. I just can't let this hurt my GPA. I won't waste my time and lose what sanity I have left from this forsaken class.

I hate this.



  1. In my personal opinion-- you are NOT stupid. And it makes me annoyed that the teacher is giving you low marks just because drawing is not your thing (which I understand; even the smiley faces I draw have tumors). It's obvious that you have an AMAZING talent in photography (jealous!). I'm sorry to hear you had to drop the class. Hope you get a better instructor next time. Chin up! :)

  2. You are far from stupid! You'll find a replacement class/teacher that you'll be ready to wow when the time comes for that. For now, just let Mr. RedMarks and his class go and do their thing. :)

  3. It's such a bad feeling when you take a class where you just can't do enough. It sounds like that teacher is pretty unfair. How frustrating. Just don't let it define you - we've all been there!

  4. Hey now! You are amazing no matter what you can or cannot do in an art class. You are not defeated. You just had something to learn, which you did... to try again another day. I think there are MANY times in life that we need to accept that now is NOT the time and we need to try again later. Buck up little cowgirl!

  5. UGH! I hate teachers that make students feel like that! my honest thoughts are that they should not be teachers!!! From the limited time i have spent with you...i already know that you are not a failure! and you have so much going for you! just try and keep your chin up. **HUGS**

  6. Eff art class. Seriously. Bunch of Emo's and Goth fruitcakes. Take a mechanic class instead. That crap is actually useful.

    That's what I think, at least... but I'm retarded so whatever.



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