Friday, February 26, 2010

A new side.

Every night I lay in bed thinking about all of the things I really want to write about. The only problem is, is that I have a lot of personal, deep, dark, feelings and memories. How personal should a public blog get and who would I hurt in the process?

I read a lot of messed up memoirs, currently The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls. Her life compared to mine was a holocaust. I found a lot of similarities though, in her life experiences and mine, and it made me feel not so alone in my thoughts. It made me feel alive and so glad to be where I am. My mom reads this blog occasionally and I can imagine her saying "I gave you everything! You had a very privileged life!". Indeed I did. But what about all of the other emotionally taxing memories I have of the past that I am stuck with? Don't you see that it's usually experiences you went through that matter and not so much the things you were given and privileged with?

My life is now a complete 360 from what I imagine it could have been had I not been:
Given a mother that is a free spirit
Shipped to my Dad at the age of 14
Had I not moved in with the LDS family when I was 16,
Had I not joined The Church
Had I not moved back to North Carolina when I was 17,
and Back to Utah when I was 18,
and met Justin when I was 19.

What matters most to me is how I am living my life now. I will be changing a whole generation of children that I will bring into this world some day. They will have it good and I want it that way. I want them to be spoiled with love every second of every day. They will know that home is a place that they can turn to. Two people will be there to accept them always.

I look back now and I feel like THE LUCKIEST girl in the entire world.
Because! My life has turned in to something great, a fairytale come true.

My raising may have not been ideal, but, I was raised right.

What say ye to hearing my life experiences? The funny ones, like digging through trashcans for bottle caps? I promise, they are entertaining especially when you put my 2 brothers in the mix!

Love, The Lady Girl


  1. I think you are, indeed, a lucky girl! You have a family who cares for you and wants the best for you. You also have a lot of support around you and are an awesome person! Your life's experiences have made you that person. Keep smiling!

  2. I'm so very glad for the way you were raised, too. I'm also thankful that your life led you back to Utah and to Justin!! Love you!

  3. I think it takes a lot of courage to talk about personal experiences in your blog. It's something I tend to avoid on my blog but I admire people who do it! :) You're a good writer so I'm sure anything you write about will be enjoyable to read.

  4. I think if you are willing to put your personal experiences out there, you ought too. You never know who will read them and who will relate to them. In fact this post makes we WANT to know more! And I agree with Elizabeth... I enjoy reading what you write.

  5. Wow...I made a lot of typos on that comment. *My apologies*


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